BOOKS: Planet Of The Damned

That damned planet!

Planet Of The Damned, Harry Harrison

Thrashed cover

    A few weekends ago, my wife, daughter, and my mother all went to a fabulous little festival in the town we live in. It's called Derryfest. It's as amazing as it sounds. It's just a big park with vendors set up under tents, basically. There are other things (a talent competition, an exotic animal exhibit, some bounce-houses for the kids, lots of food, etc), but mainly it's just walking around and visiting the tents of various local businesses. The Derry Public Library (which is directly next to this park where Derryfest was taking place) also had a tent. Well, it wasn't a tent, but they were there. You could pay two dollars and get a decent-sized bag, and you were then allowed to fill it with as many books as you could from all the available books they had outside. At first, I was like, "oh man, this is gonna be great! I'll pay two bucks and walk away with like twenty awesome books!" Well, my exuberance was a little premature. There were probably a dozen-or-so boxes of books (humorously, all the boxes were old liquor boxes), and I left there with six books (one was a book I already owned). To say the selection was awful would be an understatement. But, I was determined to somehow try to get my money's worth. I grabbed five books that looked like they might be at least partially interesting, and also looked like they might be partially sci-fi. One such book was this one here, Planet of the Damned, by the creatively-named Harry Harrison. 

    You can tell from the cover that it's thrashed. It's the worst-conditioned book I own, and I was a little concerned I wouldn't be able to finish it before pages started falling out like autumn leaves (the very first two pages fell out, plus most of the spine was ready to give out by the time I finished it. If I ever want to read this book again (improbable, but not impossible), I'll have to purchase a new copy. But hey, for essentially 33 cents, I'll take it!). But, finish it I did. This was a book that I knew absolutely zero about going in. That can oftentimes be an exciting prospect. Although, just from reading the cheesy text on the front and back of the book, my expectations were very low. But it was very short (I believe 135 pages?), so I just decided, what the hell, I'll give it a shot. 

Thrashed back cover!

    Overall, I thought this was an enjoyable book. The plot is pretty easy to follow, and there aren't a whole lot of those alien concepts thrown about that man's imagination (this man's imagination, anyway. I'm looking at you, Solaris!) can barely grasp (this is by no means "hard sci fi". Essentially, a man from a little, fairly isolated planet is recruited to help save another planet from being bombed by yet another planet. See, the planet in question that is in danger of being bombed, Dis, is full of unsociable assholes, basically. Their leaders want to drop cobalt bombs on their neighboring planet (that would be Nyjord, the aforementioned, "yet another planet"). The neighboring planet does not want bombs dropped on it, so in retaliation, they are threatening to drop hydrogen bombs on Dis. The book follows the exploits of Brion, who has been tasked with trying to save the planet Dis from total destruction. The story moves pretty fast, and there is very little down-time. From the opening chapter of Brion fencing on his home planet to win a very prestigious (at least on his planet) tournament, the action never really lets up. There are some chapters with nice violent (but not bloody or gory or anything) action, and some with speculative dialogue. 

    The descriptions of the alien planet, and the strange creatures and humanoids that live on it are good. The narration and dialogue I generally thought was decent too. The story keeps you guessing at what exactly is causing the leaders of the Disan people to want to drop bombs on their neighbors, and it isn't divulged until the last few chapters. Even the penultimate chapter has you wondering exactly what might happen to the protagonists. It's a great chapter, and a good one to (almost) end the book off with. The final chapter is the worst in the book. Without spoiling much, it's just two characters talking (in maybe some of the worst dialogue in the book), then another character joins in, and one of the characters says he wont' do something, then immediately changes his mind and says he will do it. If any of that makes sense. Even this didn't bother me much, because most of the rest of the book was good. I mean, this didn't blow me away, and it's not something that will stay with me for years, but it's a good, light, fast read. Again, for you quick readers out there, I'm sure you could blow through it in probably two days. This seems to be my shortest book post yet, but I honestly don't know if there is a whole lot more to say. Maybe that's an indictment on the book itself? Or, more likely, one on me because I can't think of anything else to write. Hell, the first paragraph was about how I bought books at our town's local festival.

    In summary, this was a good book, but not an amazing book. As far as the other sci-fi I've covered in my blog, this book ranks near the bottom. It may be on par with Orphans of the Sky, but perhaps a small notch below it. Besides that book's dumb sexism, it was enjoyable, had an interesting idea, and memorable characters. Not that Planet of the Damned doesn't have an interesting idea (it does), but the characters aren't as memorable. While I suppose you could say there's sexism to be found here, it's probably not as bad as Heinlein's book. I didn't want to mention anything about sexism, because I really don't want each sci-fi blog post about a book from the 1960's to devolve into a discussion on that, but just know there is a female character in this book, and she's instrumental in solving the book's main problem. She's handled well, but not perfectly. At any rate, it's right around Orphans of the Sky. It's not as good as Solaris, Dolphin Island, or Fantastic Voyage, but it's in no way bad. Okay, since I feel like I'm talking in circles, I'll wrap it up. 

    As far as books go, I started one a few days ago, but won't really start to get into it until next week (around October 20). Look for that post to be up around Halloween probably. Nextly, I have a few more blog posts I need to write, namely a few more Dark Souls II ones, and a brand-spanking new "B-LOG SLAYING" post. Plus other stuff. So much writing, so little time. 

I would suggest this book to fans of sci-fi that focuses on strange alien planets and creatures. It won't blow you away, but it's fast and fun. 

Broken spine

 

Aava, the King's Pet

Heavy petting?

    Here we are, ladies and gents: the final DLC for Dark Souls II, and the final few posts about the game I'll make. I think 40+ separate posts about one game is probably enough. Also, I just need to really get past this game. Not in an I'm-obsessing-over-an-old-girlfriend-and-I-need-to-get-past-her way, but more as an actual physical blockade that needs to be pushed through. What is Dark Souls II and its wonderful DLCs blocking, you might (but probably not) ask? Well, my goddamn backlog, of course! It's STILL AT 95 games! While that looms large over me like some sort of space-age, evolution-quickening monolith, I continue to just sit here and play this game which I have over 150 hours on on one character. This is all rambling at this point, but what I'm trying to say is this: I feebly tried to fight and kill a giant tiger. Here are my exploits!

    The final chapter of DLC, "Crown of the Ivory King", will, of course, have its own post, once I successfully finish it. Hopefully it will take less time than the Iron King chapter did. At any rate, this is the first boss I encountered in this DLC. Her name is Aava, and she's the King's pet (obviously). I don't know for certain that Aava is a female, but I've seen her referenced as such online, so what the hell, I'll go with it. This battle can be fought about two minutes into the DLC, but that would be a hilariously fatal thing to do. As always, I tried to keep myself from reading about the DLC before I jumped into it. And, as always, I DID read a little about it before I jumped in. I did know that, after the first bonfire, you can go left or right, and I remember reading (in more than one spot), do not go left! Aava is found there, but if you try to fight her without a specific item, you can't kill her. I didn't know why I couldn't fight her, or even what I needed to fight her with, so when I started the DLC, I didn't go left, and instead went right. Going right brings you through the first main area of the DLC. Eventually, I came upon a very ornate-looking corpse that was shining (even from a great distance I could see it). This corpse had an item called Eye of the Priestess. The description of it said something along the lines of being able to see things that which are normally unseen. I put two and two together, and wouldn't you know, it equaled four! Apparently, you need this item to fight Aava. Now, if you've put two and two together, you'll probably come to the conclusion that you can't fight Aava without this item because she is invisible! Ha, what a fun fight that would be. I'm sure someone will (or already has) beat Aava without the Eye of the Priestess. At any rate, you grab the eye, warp back to the first bonfire, and you're ready to fight another super annoying fucking DLC boss.

The calm during the storm

    Once you go down that left path, you'll soon meet a fog gate. On the way from the bonfire to the boss, there are two NPC summons (Masterless Glencour and old, venerable Steelheart Ellie). Don't worry, I'll get to them a little later (...sigh...). When you walk through the fog gate, you are in a long, slightly doglegged (I'd like to thank various Tiger Woods golf games for that versatile phrase) area. It's completely opened, and lined on either side with humongous statues. Once you walk about three-fourths of the way down, you'll see a large structure with a door, and a ledge above it.
    Walk a little closer and you'll see the boss, perched up on that ledge. This is Aava, a large white icy tiger. I really appreciate the fact that Aava is a monster boss, instead of a humanoid knight. There were not enough monster bosses in these DLCs, which was one of the most disappointing aspects of them. Besides Sinh, Aava, and the optional boss(es) of this DLC, all the other boss fights are either straight up humans/knights (Fume Knight, Sir Alonne, Burnt Ivory King, the Cave bosses) or demonic humanoids (blue Smelter and Elana). Just a bit of an aside rant, but it's kind of boring after awhile fighting the same sorts of enemies. At any rate, Aava is a pretty unique boss in the annals of Souls history. It's just a big tiger, but it looks awesome. Case in point:

She's a roaring good time!

    Aava doesn't have a huge array of attacks, and most are decently telegraphed. Despite this, I had a very difficult time fighting her. First of all, if you're close to her front or back, she can swipe her claws (VERY quickly, without warning) and hit you for big damage. I often found myself at her hind legs, hacking away, only for her to whip around with her claws and deal major damage to me. This was the attack that really had me reeling. Otherwise, she likes to jump around a lot. She will occasionally jump away from you, only to hop back and try to bite you. This attack is devastating, and unless you have full health, can kill you quickly. She'll also jump at you with claws. All the jumping attacks are pretty easy to dodge, in that you can just roll back, or even better, roll forward. This will set up for an attack or two as well. Aava has some magic attacks also. If you stay too close to her for too long, she'll pause and cause an outward explosion from her body. This one hurts quite a bit, and at first it always caught me off guard. Eventually though, you can see her rear up for it, and this gives you just enough time to roll back a few times to escape its radius (it's a pretty big radius). If you stay far away from her, she'll use a homing crystal mass-like spell, that shoots out five (I believe) soul masses, and they can track you. This isn't very difficult to dodge though. Usually, if I ran towards her as the masses form around her, I would arrive at her side, and the masses would miss me. Even if they don't, if the first does hit you, the other four will miss. And just one doesn't do huge damage. Finally, she will do an attack that makes icy spikes jut up from the ground all around her. I heard it described like the flame pillars, but except ice (obvi!). This one hurts like hell as well, but it's easy enough to run away from. Good time to heal as well.
    This was a very aggravating battle for me (what else is new?). At first, after a half-dozen-or-so attempts, I was thinking that it actually might not be a difficult battle. Of course, after another fifteen failed attempts or so, I was changing my song about that. I found it so tough because of all her close melee attacks. They are quick and tough to see coming (well, they were for me at least. Maybe I need glasses?). My general strategy was to go in, buff with flame weapon (you have plenty of space at the beginning area to buff/heal or anything like that, since the boss doesn't appear until you walk further down), and try to stay close and hack away. Of course, with her jumping all around, it was tough to stay close. But even if I did, I still paid the price anyway. I've bemoaned the fact before, but by this time, real Dark Souls II fatigue/burnout was setting in. That's not the full excuse for why I had such a tough time with this fight (an impatience at learning Aava's pattern being the main reason), but it's part of it.

When you get knocked down, you gotta get up again!

    So, in a similar fashion to almost every other boss across all three chapters of this DLC, I had to summon help. I just used the two NPC summons. Sure, they do horrible damage (with the three of us, I could do close to 400 damage, while they were whittling away with 80 damage at a time. WHY are these NPC summons so goddamn weak and pathetic?), but they provide an invaluable help: they draw large amounts of aggro. Those two could beat up (and get beat up. Seriously, why can't they roll out of the way?) on Aava if I needed a breather to heal or re-buff my sword. She generally would focus on them, and allow me free swings. It still took a few tries with my two idiotic companions, but we managed to pull through.
    I don't think there is a lot more I can add to this. The positives of the battle are that it's a monster, and not a knight. She looks great, and the little trick to actually being able to fight her is pretty cool. I found it exceptionally difficult, however, to consistently roll from her quick melee swipes. That's the most frustrating: the inconsistency of my own timing. I think a large problem is how slow my damn sword is. I really should downgrade to something fast. I will lose power (400 base power plus 226 dexterity bonus = pretty decent!), but in the end it'll probably be for the best. With Aava down, I have only TWO more Dark Souls II posts to write about: the overview of the Ivory King DLC, and the final boss of the DLC. There is an optional, "co-op" area to explore, and an optional boss to kill (much like Cave of the Dead and Iron Passage), but I am not doing those at this present time. Perhaps, someday in the future, after I've been away from the game for a few weeks, I'll try again. But it is just not worth the EXTREME aggravation to get through one of the toughest areas in all of Dark Souls II, only to fight a very lazy, annoying boss fight. I'll get into more detail in the Ivory King post. So, until then, he's one more picture of a big kitty-kat, and my final death stats:

Roar?

Times I died: 24
Difficulty: 9/10
Rating: 6/10

Happy Anniversary!

Two years and still going strong!

xoxo

    This post will be dramatically different than all my other ones. You see, today is mine and my wife's two year wedding anniversary! That's pretty big. I mean, you could say it's ONLY two years. Think of what a relatively small amount of time two years is in a common human life. However, I say two years being married is a HUGE thing. Think of how many marriages don't last two years. Think of the ones that last only one year. Think of all the relationships in general that don't last two years. My wife and I (Sandra, to the uninitiated) have been together for almost five years, and married two, and we've gone through quite a lot. But then again, who hasn't gone through a lot?
    Why am I writing this, you may ask? Am I writing this because my wife is beautiful? Well, she is. But that's not the reason. Is it because she has a smile that can turn my whole world from shitty to wonderful? Well, that's a great thing as well, but no, that isn't why I'm writing this. Is it because she's damn funny, and can always make me laugh? Nope, that's not the reason. Is it because she's the most amazing mother I've ever seen? Kara would agree, but that's not the impetuous if my writing this. Could it perhaps be because my wife Sandra is an intelligent, crafty individual? She is kicking some school ass right now, and she can whip up adorable and fun skirts for our daughter like no one's business, but even still, no, that is not why I'm writing this. Oh, is it because she has made me a better person, both in personality, worldview, and physical health. I mean, with her help, motivation, and dedication, has helped me lose 51 pounds since sometime last year (roughly a year ago, I think). That's AMAZING. And I credit her basically 100% (by the by, she's lost 150!). She's made me see the world through better eyes. I've (somewhat) seen the error of my judgemental, silly ways. But no, venerable reader, that is not why I'm writing this. Wait, wait! Is it because she makes me feel safe and comfortable? Is it because, no matter how bad things are, she ALWAYS makes me feel better? She's also great at that. But nay, that's not why!
    I'm writing this little blog post because I'm married to my best friend. Do you know how amazing, how absolutely special it feels, to be married to your best friend? To know, every day, that that friend will be there for you. That she'll wake up in the morning with you, and she'll  go to bed at night with you. I'm not a religious person in the least, but I think the word "blessed" can be used outside of a religious sense. I feel blessed to have Sandra by my side, every day, every hour, every minute, every damn second. Sure, I can annoy her, or even really piss her off (never on purpose, I promise), but she's always still there. Even if I hurt her feelings because I'm a dolt, she's there, more willing than ever to be my best friend. I feel blessed for that.
    Sandra, I love you with all my heart, and I can't wait to spend another five, ten, fifteen, hell, five hundred years with you! Happy anniversary mama!


Okay, enough of the mooshy stuff. Here is a list of things my wife has turned me on to (in no particular order, after #1):

• Lost
• Sons of Anarchy
• Alexisonfire
• City And Colour
• Thrice
• Borderlands
• The Arkham Batman games (hey, still snuck video games in here!)
• The wonderful taste of eggplant
• Also, the wonderful tastes of: broccoli, eggs (sort of), celery, stuffed peppers, tacos, meatloaf (not Meatloaf, though), and just generally healthier eating

Okay, I think that might be everything. I'm sure I've forgotten some things, but that is the large bulk of the important stuff. Until next time everyone, good night. Give your lovers an extra hug!

Introduction to My Weekly "Shane Remembers..." Posts

Sometimes I sort of remember things!

    In an ongoing effort to fill this blog with more than just Dark Souls II, random books, and my backlog adventures (which will take literal years to complete. If I even can), I decided I'd also like to try to finally get some retro goodness in here. I was thinking a few days ago, for no discernible reason at all, about Need For Speed II. This thought spawned a simple, yet potentially interesting idea for a weekly post. Every Friday, I'm going to just pick five games, completely at random, that I remember playing in my formative years. Games that I rented a few times, or ones I borrowed from friends, or ones I used to own outright. The whole goal is to just stimulate discussion of old (but not always that old) games. Most of these will be very short, and some will probably be boring, but that's why you're here, isn't it? For short, boring anecdotes about games like the aforementioned Need for Speed II. Also, it's a way to just talk about and introduce games/genres I would otherwise NEVER EVER TALK ABOUT HERE. So, buckle in, grab some hot cocoa, un-buckle out, pour out your hot cocoa, grab an alcoholic beverage, cozy yourself up in a big comfy chair, hop into a hammock, pour out your alcoholic beverage, and get ready to care very deeply about the words I will type every Friday.

BOSSES: Arkham Origins

Jumping off the pages of the comics straight into your face!

    I've decided to dedicate an entire post to the bosses in Batman: Arkham Origins. This is the first game I've played besides Dark Souls II since I started this blog that actually has good boss battles. All the games for my B-LOG SLAYINGS posts (so far) have had small numbers of mediocre-to-forgettable battles, so they don't need their own posts. But, this game has a lot of battles, and most of them are quite good. I'll do a little rundown here, posting pictures and writing about each one. Let's do it, guys! (note: They'll basically be organized by order I fought them in) (hey, second note: some of the pictures (mainly Killer Croc) are not good. Sometimes it's tough to get good pictures while these assholes constantly move. Also, I don't have pics for Mad Hatter or Anarky, but you aren't missing much)

Killer Croc:

He does not have four arms

      This is the first battle of the game, and it happens roughly thirty minutes into the story mode. Before the fight, Croc and Bats exchange words about who smells worse (it's probably not who you'd expect, I'd say), and then the fight is on. I had a bit of difficulty with this guy too. It was probably me being rusty at Arkham games (although, we'll come to find out over on the B-LOG SLAYING post for this game, I think I just kinda suck at these games), since I hadn't played one in a couple years. At any rate, he's not very complex. He's a big goon, essentially, so you gotta give him the ol' cape-stun him followed with a nice beatdown. After this happens a few times (or once, I don't remember. I'm a very bad note taker. That's part of my charm though), he'll grab a gas canister and huck it at you. If it hits you, it explodes! Who woulda thunk it? Obviously, this is bad, and it hurts tremendously. After a bit more fighting, this happens: 

It's a helicopter. Note the flaming gas can

    You fight Croc on a rooftop, and as such, a helicopter comes by to drop off some thugs. Why the hell not, right? The battle is still the same, really. Beat up the thugs, keep an eye on Croc, and make sure you dodge the damn flaming gas cans he throws at you. Eventually, you'll beat him enough, and the battle ends. Then he gets arrested, and that's that.

-------------------------------------------------------------

ELECTROCUTIONER:

How could this NOT have been a great fight?

    This guy is the first of a few "non-battles", and this one is the most disappointing. This had, "amazingly diverse, interesting battle" written all over it. They missed a great opportunity here. Anyway, Electrocutioner (fucking awesome name, too) looks menacing (with his shock-gloves and his humorous shit-talking), but this "battle" is one punch, and that's that. He even has a health bar and everything. But all he does is talk, and all you have to do is walk up to him and punch. He is knocked out, and you are told later you can trace him from the electricity his gloves give off. At this point, I figured I'd get an actual fight against this guy. Nope, he gets killed later on in the game. That's it. Oh well, you get his shock-gloves, and they rock the damn house 

See? Rocking the house

-------------------------------------------------------------

Deathstroke:

This guy, and battle, are both badass

    This is easily the best battle in the game. I can safely say that. I love the way he looks, with that awesome black/orange mask and the one eye-hole. About halfway through the battle, you literally beat the mask off his face. He doesn't look nearly as awesome with his mask off because then he's basically just a dude with an eye patch.
    Deathstroke (Strokey?) uses some kind of martial arts pole, and boy, is he proficient with it! In fact, he's Batman's equal as far as fighting goes. This is a battle with two expert martial artists going at it with the full intention of beating the other into bloody submission. Because of this, the battle flows beautifully, and it is a great joy to just sit back and watch it unfold. If only you didn't have to hold the controller and dictate half of the battle.

He's a monster with that pole

    This battle features LOTS of countering, so you certainly have to be on your toes. Truly, all of the countering (of both you AND Deathstroke) looks magnificent, and it's almost like a ballet. This battle epitomizes what the Arkham games can do so well. As far as strategy, all you have to do is attack, dodge, and counter, and you can beat him down occasionally as well. Towards the end of the battle, Batman will break the pole, and Deathstroke takes out a Katana (I believe, anyway). It's more of the same though. Just pay attention, and victory will be yours!

Deathstroke DOESN'T like when you DON'T hit him

-------------------------------------------------------------

ANARKY:

    This battle is super lame. Once you track down Anarky, all you do is fight him in a giant group of thugs. He looks cool, at least, with us baggy clothes, backpack, and his strange human face mask (not a mask made of an actual human face, unfortunately, but a mask that looks like a nondescript face). He also wields an electric stick, to fairly substandard results. Once you take out all the other thugs, you deliver a punch to his masked face, and BAM! fight over. I feel just a little cheated to not have a more proper one-on-one fight with Anarky. Maybe they thought that Anarky would be too under matched to face off against Bats. Whatever the reason, I was disappointed with this one. And, as stated above, I don't have any pics for this one (I think they were accidentally deleted actually).

-------------------------------------------------------------

MAD HATTER:

    Okay, now THIS isn't even a boss battle. I'm still going to include it, because it's one of the Most Wanted side missions, and it features a prominent Batman villain. After you make it through the trippy Hatter area (reminiscent of the Scarecrow segments from Arkham Asylum a bit), you find him, holding a young woman, "Alice", hostage. All you have to do is throw a single reverse batarang so that it hits him in the back of the head. Easy as pie. I don't have a picture for this "battle" either (hell, it's barely even an, "encounter"), but you aren't missing anything. On a final note, as if to cement this as a "non-boss battle", it's the fact that Hatter doesn't even have a health bar. At least Anarky had his own health bar!

-------------------------------------------------------------

COPPERHEAD:

Oh, should be easy!

  

    Before the battle, she injects you with some sort of mind-altering poison. Because of this, you're a bit sluggish for the battle. Also, you fight Copperhead and at least ten Copperhead copies. I assume this is a result of the poison she gave you. Only the real Copperhead will take damage to her health bar, but all of them can be attacked and beaten. Some of the copies (but not all) carry knives, so you have to juggle normal counters, knife counters, and you need to keep your head about you. My strategy was to just beat all of their asses, because I couldn't tell the real one from all the fakes. Not that it mattered much, because beating on them all was enough to deplete the real one's health bar. They all flip and slither around impressively, too. Overall, this battle isn't too hard. Don't get ganged up on, keep your head on a swivel, and time those counters well!

Eh...still easy...

Jeez, that's a lot of Copperheads!

BONUS PIC!

The accidental blurriness of this pic actually makes it cooler

-------------------------------------------------------------

BANE (1ST BATTLE): 

I thought this was a perfect pic to sum up Bats and Bane's relationship

This one too

    This is a pretty good fight. It showcases (both in the fight itself, and in the cutscenes) just how brutally strong Bane is. This fight starts in an old, dusty library. I must say, great atmosphere in this place, and it looks great to fight in. Bane starts out in a trench coat, and you have to use your super cape-stun to apply a proper beat down on him. After a bit of back-and-forth fighting, he takes off the trench coat and showcases his trademark Venom tubes.

Bane...MAD! (that's how he talks, right?)

    

    He presses a button, and much like today's popular MLB athletes, gets himself juiced up to really fight. After some more fighting, you both go tumbling out of one of the large windows and land on a rooftop below. For whatever reason, I didn't get any pictures of the fight on the rooftop. Just know it's more of the same, except some thugs join in on the fun. Of course they do. When DON'T they? All you have to do is beat on the thugs, and dodge his running attack. When he's in his Venom state however, he is invulnerable. You can beat him down, and you then get a prompt for another combo that rips out one of his Venom-providing tubes from his body, thusly turning him back into normal ol' crazy Bane. Once his health gets low, a helicopter will fly in, a scene will play, and he'll hitch a ride with said 'copter. Until we meet again, dear Bane...

-------------------------------------------------------------

DEADSHOT:

He looks like a snowy park ranger

    This battle is underwhelming, I'd say. It's essentially a predator encounter with Deadshot thrown in. You have to use all manner of stealth (lurking high up in the shadows, slinking through vents, stuff like that) to take out the armored thugs in the room with Deadshot. What makes Deadshot unique is his ability to shoot you from anywhere in the room. If he sees you, he can aim his gun and bounce his bullets off of walls and floors and. It's an interesting mechanic, and he uses it to intimidate the thugs around him as well. Once you take out all the thugs, you can jump down and beat the hell out of Deadshot. He barely puts up a fight in close range. See:

Pathetic

    You gotta be quick once you are toe-to-toe with him though, because he'll call in more goons shortly after you dispatch all the original ones. After Deadshot's health gets low, he'll take a hostage (a man that was tied up to a chair in the middle of the room) and threaten to kill him if Batman gets close. You have to sneak up to Deadshot and perform a takedown without being seen to finish the battle. Generally I thought the battle was boring (like I said, just a slightly beefed up predator encounter), but having to sneak up on Deadshot to take him out was pretty cool. It reminded me of the amazing Mr. Freeze fight from Arkham City. At any rate, I preferred Deadshot from that game too.

He stands!

-------------------------------------------------------------

BLACK MASK:

Cell-shaded Batman?

    Maybe I shouldn't have said that the boss battles were a highlight of this game. While they are a few that are masterfully executed, I feel like so many I want to start with the phrase, "this fight was lame..." This fight with the "antagonist" of the main game is basically just a big group fight. Sionis (Black Mask) fights alongside a big group of thugs, including two martial arts guys and an armored thug, so at least there is some variety, and that makes the battle a little less boring. You need some crowd control but ultimately Sionis here is no different than any other run-of-the-mill chump you fight throughout the game. He isn't even wearing that awesome mask, which I consider to be the ONLY thing that makes him awesome. 

There he is, ready to box

Shouldn't he at least have a gun? At least he's got guts

    The strategy is to just whale on everyone, and eventually you'll take them all, Sionis included, down. For some odd reason, he does not have a health bar. Even Anarky has a health bar. Very strange.

-------------------------------------------------------------

SHIVA:

"What're you lookin' at?" - framed portrait in the background

    Shiva, while fairly bland to look at, is an interesting character in the game.You have to do a few things to find and fight her, and her fight is a bit tricky. You first fight Shiva along with some female Shiva-esque ninjas with swords. Later on, you fight her with those martial artist guys. The first part of this battle has Shiva fighting like one of those martial artists (wherein you have to perform several counters in a row). When Shiva gets down to about half health, she pulls out a katana (I wanna say) and now you have to blade dodge her while still paying attention to those aggressive martial artists.

My trademark blurry pic

SWORDS!

    The battle can be a bit tricky because there are varying fighting styles used, and Shiva herself changes styles through the battle. Even so, not terribly difficult. I have no idea who Shiva is, though. I'm guessing from dialogue she might have a connection to Ra's Al Ghul. I made a note to research it, but really, I don't care enough. If you're here, reading this, you aren't reading it to gain an understanding and background info on semi-obscure Batman villain.

 -------------------------------------------------------------

BIRD:

Nice tat, bro

  

    This is Bane's lieutenantt. He's a normal looking thug-sort of guy, but he has some sort of...bird tattoo, I guess. On his face. His mouth/chin area specifically. He was the guy flying the helicopter that picked up Bane at the end of that first battle. Anyway, this battle is super easy. I can't even say I think there was a missed opportunity here, like I've said of a few others. This guy is just boring and generic, and as such, so is his battle. This is another, "fight a barely-recognizable-amidst-a-group-of-normal-thugs-boss" kind of battle. There are two Venom-raging guys as well, but they are barely a problem. This whole battle plays out very similarly to most of the other Most Wanted battles. If you pay attention, and stay on top of crowd control, you'll all be fine. The Venom guys add a slightly new wrinkle, but just barely. They are like toned down, tamer versions of Bane.

Oh yeah, some guys have knives too

The Venom thugs give off a lovely green glow

-------------------------------------------------------------

FIREFLY:

 

He's just fireflying all over the place!

    Now this is what I'm talking about! I'll give the game credit here, because they left some of the best battles for the end. This is the penultimate boss battle for the storyline, and it's a damn good one. It's probably tied with Deathstroke as being the best in the game. After going through a burning, destroyed, dilapidated Pioneers Bridge, you find the culprit, Firefly. He looks AWESOME, with his pilot's helmet and those sweet jet-pack-wing things. Most of the battle, Firefly is flying around, far away from you, shooting huge amounts of fire down at you, courtesy of his flamethrower. You need to dodge these, and when you get a chance, quickfire the glue grenades. These will cause him to stop flying, and this gives you an opportunity to quickfire a bunch of batarangs at him. These only take off small slices of his health, though. Once you do glue grenade/batarang thing a few times he'll become disoriented, and you can quickfire the batclaw at him. You then have to reel him close to you, basically like a fish. Once he is close enough, you can give him a good pounding!

He really does look great

     After you beat him a few times after reeling him in, he'll fly off to a different part of the bridge. There's a very short section where you follow him, then it's back to the action. Now he'll throw several grenades which have to be dodged, and he'll shoot more direct fire at you. The battle is still the same though: dodge all the fiery bullshit (which can actually be kind of tough), glue grenade him, batarang him, batclaw him, and pound him! This is a great, nuanced battle. There's lots involved in it, and it takes place on a great-looking set-piece. There is a real sense of urgency to not only this battle, but the entire section. It's probably my favorite part of the whole main story. I said this battle is tied with Deathstroke, and it is. It's almost the exact opposite of that one: where Deathstroke is a calm, honorable opponent who matches your martial arts chops, Firefly is a crazy psychopath that cares for nothing other than fiery destruction. If only a couple more of the lesser battles had been as good as this (read: not just throw the boss in a group of thugs), this game could have had some of the better boss battles in any game I've played in years.

"Quick! Get the baking soda!"

I only saved this one 'cause it looks like he's ascending to heaven

-------------------------------------------------------------

BANE (2ND BATTLE):

Such a BANE in the neck!

He's seeing green!

    After making your way through Blackgate Prison, and through several large rooms that are nothing more than gauntlets of dozens of enemies, we get to the end of the game, and a final showdown with Bane. This battle comes in two parts, and part one is pretty easy, yet a bit annoying. He'll charge at you, and you have to dodge out of the way. For whatever reason, I had a tough go of it trying to time my dodges perfectly. Once he charges around a bit, you'll be able to use the ultra cape stun, then administer a beatdown. A brief cut-scene of Bane picking up Batman and "breaking his back" occurs. After this, Batman powers up the shock gloves, and they can be used permanently. After this, surprise surprise, thugs join in on the fun. There's very few one-on-one battles in this game. That's pretty disappointing really. But, that's also besides the point. After the thugs came in, I still just focused on jumping all around the arena, trying to dodge Bane's charges. After a few beatdowns, Bane will be defeated, and, seemingly dead. You then have to restart Bane's heart with the shock gloves, in order for Batsy here to not break his one, sacred rule. You see, Joker rigged an electric chair that he sat himself on. It was rigged to Bane's heart rate: if it got too high, the chair would turn on, and fry Joker to death. To save Joker's life, Batman would have to kill Bane and stop his heart.

He's in a lot of BANE!

[add bad Bane pun here]

    So, Batman, being the swell guy he is, gets Bane's heart going again! Hoorah! Does Bats get a "thank you"? Maybe a handshake? Even a simple nod to indicate recognition of a life saved? Nope! Bane is (surprisingly) pissed, and he wants blood. He injects himself with, I assume, some stronger variant of the normal Venom he has flowing through him. Now, looking like a late 90's era Mark McGwire (author's note: I know I also made a steroidal Sammy Sosa reference in the B-LOG SLAYING post about this game, but come on! It's too easy not too) (second author's note: I just reread my first Bane post up there, and I made another steroid/MLB reference. I'm a bad man!), Bane's ready to rip Batman limb-from-limb. And so the second part of the battle starts!

MUTATED BANE (TN-1):

 
    This is the final fight. It's part-two of the above encounter, but it's so different, I decided I'd split this post up just a bit. After Bane injects himself with the TN-1, he mutates into a grotesque, cartoonishly large, version of himself. Batman smartly uses his explosive gel to blow a hole in the floor, and you both fall in. From here on out, it's a fairly standard predator encounter. You are in a narrow cell block replete with grates, vents, and electrified parts of the walls. You certainly can't take Ultra-Bane here mano-e-mano, so it's time for some sneaking!

Grrrr!

Fine, Frank Thomas maybe?

    Bane will stalk the hallways, and if he catches up to you, he'll smash you around good, doing pretty decent damage to your health bar. You have to hide in the vents or grates, or use smoke pellets, and sneak up on him, to get a, "silent takedown" prompt. Once you get this prompt, Batman jumps on Bane's back and essentially drives him like a huge truck. You can slam him into a normal wall, which does minimal damage to his own health bar, or you can steer him into those electrified areas. If you can drive him into these, he'll take initial damage from it, and you can also do a mini-beat down on him for more damage. After a few hits, he'll get up, and you gotta be on the run again.

Bane, stalking

    I appreciate the fact that this part of the battle is much different than the first two encounter, but it's still pretty easy. Just hide (detective vision helps tremendously), wait for him to have his back turned, sneak up, and press the prompt. About two-thirds of the way through the battle, someone wearing a jammer will appear, and you won't be able to use your detective vision until you take the jammer out. I'm not actually sure where the jammer is, because I was able to finish the battle without bothering trying to find it. After you deplete Bane's health, that's it. You string him up, and that's that. A pretty good final battle. It's no Deathstroke or Firefly, and it's not like the excellent Clayface battle at the end of Arkham City, but this is serviceable. In fact, this battle can be seen as a microcosm of the whole game: it's good, but not as good as the previous. It's serviceable.

-------------------------------------------------------------

BONUS: THE JOKER:

    Real quick here. This isn't really a battle, but it's not a battle in the same way that Mad Hatter wasn't a battle. If that makes any sense. I was torn if I should take a few pictures, or if I should include this here at all. I decided to just briefly write about it. After beating Bane, you find Joker in the chapel. He wants you to kill him. He tries to force Batman to do it. He doesn't, of course. The, "battle", as it were, is just you performing a few beatdowns on the Joker. It's nothing special, but at least you get to beat the ever-loving hell out of him, and leave him as close to death's door as Batman will allow. 

   Welp, that's all folks! The bosses in this game are, for the most part, good. Some are lame, lazy, or downright just boring, but I think the ones that are good more than make up for it. It's nice to be able to fight all these different colorful characters, even if most of the battles boil down to, "fight X BOSS in this group of enemies". Oh well, at least we got Deathstroke and Firefly. It's just nice, personally, for me to play a game (other than Dark Souls II) currently that has some worthwhile boss battles. I hope you all have enjoyed reading, and if you think anything is wrong, worded incorrectly, or sounds like crap, hey, let me know! It's the only way I'll learn. 

B-LOG SLAYING: Batman: Arkham Origins (PS3)

Batman KA-POWS! a bunch of bad guys (again)

    Here we finally have a new B-LOG SLAYING post! Unfortunately for Arkham Origins, the three chapters of Dark Souls II DLC came out while I was playing it, and obviously anything Souls related takes precedence over everything else video game related. Arkham games and Souls games are at least slightly intertwined with me, because almost the exact thing happened with Arkham City. It came out right around the time Dark Souls came out, so Batman was pushed to the back burner. I wonder if Arkham Knight and Bloodborne will release concurrently?

Menacing

    Anyway, this post seems a little strange for me to write, because unlike the first three B-LOG SLAYING posts (Silent Hill: Downpour, Aliens: Infestation, and The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy), this is a game that probably a lot of people have played, or at least heard of it. Sure, Silent Hill is a fairly well known brand, but I'm sure the number of people who have played--or at least heard of--it, compared to the number that have heard of or played the Arkham games, well it's gotta be like a 3:1 ratio*. So why should you land here, and read my thought about this well known game? Do you really have anything better to do? Yeah, I didn't think so. Without further adieu (and inane babbling from me), let's run through the cons and pros (note, bosses will have there own separate post. You can read it here):

CONS:

• There isn't enough new here. It's a lot of the same ol', same ol'. Which is fine for awhile, but I started to really get burnt out from the formula about halfway through
• Traversing the city is mighty annoying and tedious
• A minor annoyance, but there are some very lame, throwaway boss encounters (and missed opportunities, too)
• Finally, I'll also say that this game is not very hard. I mean, sure, I saw the "game over" screen more than enough times, but there's basically no penalty to dying/failing a mission. 

PROS:

• The whole game, from graphics, to voice acting, to story, are all very well done
• Most of the boss battles are great fun. They are highlights of the game
• The combat is still fluid. It flows beautifully, and it's still a sight to behold
• Lots to do besides main story mode

    My biggest complaint about the game stems from the fact that it just isn't different enough from Arkham City. The change from Arkham Asylum to Arkham City was big, and it made the resulting City game much better than its predecessor as a result. There was more to do and a much bigger world to explore. Everything was nicely tweaked and it made that game damn near perfect. The change from City to Arkham Origins is very subtle. It doesn't give you a brand new area to traverse (there are new areas, of course, but you're still in the same silent city you were in in the previous game), first of all. It throws in a few new enemy types, at least (I love those martial arts guys. Very fun to fight), but this still isn't a revolutionary change. You would expect new enemies in a new game. Riddler trophies are replaced with Riddler data packs to collect. They are still hidden behind traps. I found all of them in Arkham City. It was fun. It was also very frustrating. I wanted to find all those damn things. In this game, Origins, I really just didn't want to find all the data packs. Maybe I'm just too burnt out on the Arkham games in general, but all I wanted to do is get through the main story mode and see the credits. This is strange since I haven't played any of the games in about 2-3 years, so I shouldn't be burnt out. Make no mistake, this is definitely a good game. But for some reason, I'm very blah about it. Even when I think of other franchises that tend to play it safe with sequels, and I'll use God of War as an example, I don't find myself getting sick of them the way I have this game. Hell, God of War is probably more guilty of not changing the formula game-to-game than the Batman games are (come on though, God of War III is the one of the greatest games ever made. I won't accept, "no it isn't", as a response), yet I come back to GoW time and time again. Who knows? My fingers are crossed that Arkham Knight is not just Arkham Origins with next-gen (which is actually current gen. Weird how I still consider it "next-gen") graphics. Bring something NEW to the table, dammit! Is that enough italicisation for you for one paragraph?
    Getting around the city is, for the most part, a fairly large annoyance. Maybe I don't remember correctly, or maybe I'm looking at it through bat-shaped glasses, but I don't remember being annoyed traversing through Arkham City. Firstly, a new addition to the map is the Gotham Pioneers Bridge. This thing is a chore to get across, and you have to go back and forth over it (and do various things on/under/around it) probably 750 times throughout the game. You can unlock fast travel spots that your Batwing can bring you to, but I even find this mildly annoying to do. You have to go into the map menu, figure out where you wanna go, then watch a cut scene of Batman shooting a grapnel up to his flying automated ship, then watch a cut scene of it flying on an almost static background, until you get loaded back into the game. It almost takes as long as just repelling through the city. My game froze on one of these Batwing screens before, so I'm a little weary to always use them, which admittedly is kinda flimsy reasoning on my part (you came for the flimsy reasoning, and you stayed for the bad pictures, right?). Here's a good question though: why can't Batman hook onto EVERY GODDAMN ROOFTOP HE SEES? HE'S BATMAN! I realize the short answer is: it's a video game, and video games can't give you 100% total freedom. I understand that. But when I'm standing directly below a rooftop, and I can't hook onto it, even though I can hook onto one that's 800 feet away, that's very annoying. For all this game does to make you feel like Batman, this decidedly makes me feel like NOT-Batman.

This is the bridge...

    I won't spend much time on the boss fights, since they will have their own post, but some of the battles are just Lame, with that capital "L" for some serious emphasis. Mad Hatter barely even qualifies for a fight, and Electrocutioner is severely disappointing because it could have been so very cool (I would guess). When these games get bosses right, they are memorable, fun, interesting, and challenging (or at least tricky). Why couldn't the 'Cutioner be all of those? For shame! As far as Hatter, they could have given us a more appropriate battle. I mean, why the hell not? Also, battles like Anarky, Deadshot, and Black Mask are literally just fighting a big mob of enemies with a slightly tougher (or not, in the case of Anarky) enemy thrown in the mix. Luckily the good battles are great.
    Let's talk about the difficulty briefly. I know once you beat it, you can go through on a NG+ deal, where the enemies are harder and they don't give you the colored "counter" warnings. However, speaking of the main game first playthrough, it's not very hard. Sure, I've been either killed or had a mission failed plenty, but that's partly because I can afford to be careless. The worst that happens if you die is restarting at the last checkpoint, which was probably three minutes away. So, if you die, eh, oh well! You'll just get back there and do it again. Boss battles range from, "easy" to "mildly challenging". Nothing rage inducing. Maybe I shouldn't call the difficulty a con, because I don't plan on going through again on NG+. Does that make this whole argument null and void? Hmm, maybe. Just know, going in, your first playthrough will not be terribly challenging.

    Okay, I've torn this game up enough. Let's talk about why this game is still great fun, and a worthy addition to most gamers' libraries.

    I kind of rolled up graphics, story, and voice-acting into one singular pro. Firstly, the graphics are great. I mean, obviously they are, right? It's a late (then) current era game. I feel like talking about graphics for PS3 games is kind of pointless, unless they are stupendously awesome or horribly trashy. The city, thugs, villains, and Batman, all look great here, and better than the previous games. The voice acting too, while it doesn't have Kevin Conroy or Mark Hamill as Batman and the Joker (respectively), is still great. The new guys (Roger Craig Smith and Troy Baker, again, respectively) are fabulous, and I don't personally really even notice that the same two voice actors weren't used. Joker, specifically, is played magnificently here. Everyone else is also good. No complaints there. Finally, the story, I think, is mostly great. Ignoring the problem of Batman's arsenal (this is a prequel to the first two games. When Batman acquires all the cool gadgets, gear, and upgrades in this game, they don't transfer over to the other games, obviously. It's strange from a story perspective that Batman wouldn't keep all this stuff with him. Maybe he lost it all?), the story is a great, engaging one. Black Mask has put a bounty on Batman's head, and eight masterful assassins have descended on Gotham to find and kill Batman, and claim that reward. I want to mention one part of the game, probably about three quarters in, that frankly, blew me away. So, be warned, spoilers ahead!

I'm Batman! Don't read spoilers!

    There's a segment where you are trying to get to the Joker in a penthouse high up in a building. This is where you fight Bane, and really meet the Joker for the first time. From the cut scene right before you fight Bane, until you finally take control of Batman again, it's absolutely stunning and gripping. Firstly, when you get up to the Joker, you get a cut scene of Bane quite literally just manhandling Batman like a damn rag doll. It shows Bane's brutal strength great. After that battle, Batman saves Joker's life from falling to his death. Joker then promptly gets arrested and is sent to Blackgate Prison. There, he gets analyzed by a very familiar looking psychologist (hint: it's Harley Quinn!). As Joker is telling the psychiatrist things, you get to play as Joker as you wander/fight through a nightmarish indoor amusement park. Part of this has you donning a red cape and a red helmet (sans eye- and mouth-holes). The whole thing is a great insight into the relationship of Batman and Joker, and it's a hell of a first meeting of the two (as far as the game's lore is concerned). It also showcases my favorite thing that plays between Batman and Joker: Batman can't kill anyone, even this deranged psychopath. Joker can kill everyone except Batman. I know it's an oft-treaded topic between these two, but this whole section is another satisfying part of that story to be added.

Taking control of the Joker is short-lived, but it's still great

End spoiler-y goodness here!

    This section was a true highlight of a story I enjoyed throughout. Definitely a strong suit for the game. Another section of the game, that comes right towards the end, I also thought was magnificent. Trying to apprehend Firefly (this isn't a spoiler. He's one of the eight assassins you see in that cut scene after the Killer Croc battle waaay back in the beginning of the game) on Gotham Pioneers Bridge was fun, varied (combat, predator encounters, hack/decoding, platforming/navigating through a twisted, destroyed bridge), and frankly, exhilarating. My favorite part of the whole game, I think.
    Again, I won't spend too much time on the bosses, but as I said above, when this game gets the boss fights right, they get them super duper right. Fights like Killer Croc, Copperhead, and Bane (the first time around) are interesting, and it's nice to beat these goons to a pulp. The highlights are clearly Deathstroke and Firefly. Those are two amazing looking, fun-as-hell battles! One of my favorite parts of all the Arkham games are the boss battles. Usually, across the trilogy so far, they get them right (that icky Sammy Sosa-looking Joker battle at the end of Asylum notwithstanding). I might have said it too many times, but these fights really are fun. Isn't that why we play games in the first place? To have fun? Here's to hoping Arkham Knight has more memorable boss battles. Maybe they'll even change the ways we look at boss battles. If there is one series that could revolutionize boss battles, it very well could be this one.
    Combat in these games has always been another delightful highlight. I could be a real pessimistic asshole and say the combat straddles being more of the, "same ol' same ol'" crap that I bemoaned above, but I won't. Because this Bat-glass is half full. The combat flows very fluidly, and it is a true sight to behold. Jumping into a gang of a dozen (or more) thugs and beating their asses, without taking damage, and really taking minimal effort, makes you feel like a Bat-god. It starts off simply enough, with only really one button commanding all of Batman's moves, but it has sneaky depth and complexity. Admittedly, I'm not that great at the game (another symptom of wanting to rush through to the end?). I hardly utilize the various specials and combos that I have available. I usually just forget how to do them. I believe you can turn screen prompts on to let you know when (and how) you can perform a certain move. Perhaps I should explore this more? At any rate, the combat is rewarding and fun (there's that word again!).
    Finally, besides the main story, there is a lot in-game for you to do. As mentioned, you can find the Riddler's data packs (they are still all puzzle-based, and some seem quite head-scratchingly irritating). Edward Nigma is part of a large set of side quests called Most Wanted. These are where you'll fight many of the bosses in the game. The whole goal is to apprehend these criminals at large. They are fun and diverse. There are nine total, and completing them all will certainly take some time. As you traverse Arkham City, you'll pick up crimes-in-progresses, where the police will ask for any available officer to a crime-scene. If you choose to pursue these, you'll end up at a large group of enemies to dispatch. I think this just nets you XP, but they are still a nice distraction. You can also analyze crime scenes throughout the game, and arrest the perpetrators of these crimes. While I appreciate the inclusion of the whole crime scene analyzing stuff (Batman is a detective, after all), it's nothing more than looking for highlighted objects in first person, then holding "X" while they are scanned. Even so, they are provide a little bit of deviation from the normal shenanigans of beating people senseless. Finally, and maybe I should devote more time to this (but I'm not going to), there are challenge maps (dedicated challenges to be completed with certain objectives or limits) that can be played outside of the main game. I haven't tried any of them yet, and unfortunately I don't plan to. If my backlog wasn't 90+ games long, I'd probably jump into them, because they were enjoyable in Arkham City. As it stands, I just don't have the time. Oh hey, there's also an online multiplayer mode that can be played. I've never played it; I don't plan to play it; I don't even know what it's all about exactly. So, with all that stuff mentioned, there's a hell of a lot to do with this game, if you have the time.

SO MUCH FUN!

    This game can be great fun, and you could certainly do worse, but this is definitely the worst of the trilogy. Now, "worst" doesn't mean "bad. On the contrary. I would suggest this to any fan of the first two. Hell, even for the newbies out there, this wouldn't be a bad place to start, if you haven't played an Arkham game yet. This game just doesn't differentiate itself enough from its amazing predecessor, and that lends to a feeling of retreading old ground. In the end, I'm glad I played it, and I'm sure eventually I'll come back and re-play it, or try to get 100%, or something like that.

Snow!